Animals do not commit suicide

　　Time magazine says there is a "scientific debate" going on about whether animals commit suicide. What a load of poppycock!
　　The Mind Hacks blog links to Time's article, at least pointing out that: "The piece doesn't answer the question of whether animals can end it all, but is a fascinating look at how the idea that they can has gone in and out of fashion."
　　In case there's any confusion about whether animals can top themselves: they can't.
　　Animals would first need to be shown to have a well-developed sense of self before we could even consider the idea that they might decide to voluntarily end their lives. There is some evidence in a few animals for this, notably great apes, dolphins and elephants. Some corvids - birds in the family that includes crows and rooks - might be able to "know themselves" too.
　　Some robots have passed the mirror test, but dogs, horses and cats? There's no evidence that these animals have a sense of self.
　　The Time story comes from a paper discussing the history of the idea, from Aristotle to Victorian times. How this discussion of dusty anecdote becomes a "scientific debate" is unclear, to say the least.
　　But a quick web search reveals the idea is strongly ingrained. A bridge in Scotland is famous for regular apparent cases of dog suicide.
　　Our readiness to believe that our pets might top themselves in grief after we die clearly says more about human vanity than animal behaviour. As a sensible member of the Scottish Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals told The Times: "Animals do not commit suicide".
　　There is one animal that if we stretch the point, could be said to "commit suicide": the Japanese foliage spider. Females allow their young to consume their own body.