英语美文欣赏：现代智语

    Words of Wisdom for the Modern Age

    现代智语

    IN This ARTICLE： Wisdom today means something different for the young， modem Western generation.

    本文简介：对今天西方的年轻一代来说，智慧别有一番含义。

    [1] Wisdom of the ancients always served civilisation well. In the age of the TV sitcom ， witty New York repartee and the instant one-liner， Western wisdom in the modern sense can mean something more like the dialogue from an American sitcom. Here's sampling of the some of the wittier one-lines circulating through Western society circles these days：

    [2] I can only please one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow is not looking good either.

    [3] 1 love deadlines. I especially like the wooshing sound they make as they go flying by.

    [4] Tell me what you need， and I'll tell you how to get along without it.

    [5] Accept that some days you are the pigeon and some days the statue.

    [6] Needing someone is like needing a parachute. If they aren't there the first time， chances are you won't be needing them again.

    [7] On the keyboard of life， always keep one finger on the escape key.

    [8] You are slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter.

    古人的智慧对文明总是大有裨益。在电视情景喜剧、纽约式的机智问答和即兴的单句俏皮话大行其道的时代，现代意义上的西方智慧更像是一出美国情景喜剧里对白之类的东西。以下是近来在西方社会流传的一些具有代表性的单句睿语：

    我每天只能取悦一个人。今天轮不到你。明天看上去也不太妙。

    我喜欢最后期限。我尤其喜欢它们飞驰而过时发出的嗖嗖声。

    告诉我你需要什么，然后我会告诉你没有它怎么过。

    接受这一事实——有时你是在雕像上随意排泄的鸽子，有时你是那倒霉的雕像。

    需要某个人就像需要一顶降落伞。如果他们第一时间不在场，你就可能再也没有需要他们的机会了。

    在生活的键盘上，始终要把一个手指按在“退出”键上。

    你比一群在花生酱中乱窜的海龟还要慢。

    [9] Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons， because you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.

    [10] Everybody is somebody else's weirdo.

    [11] Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

    [12] Don't be irreplaceable——if you can't be replaced， you can't be promoted.

    [13] Eat one live frog the first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you for the rest of the day.

    [14] Everything can be filed under miscellaneous.

    [15] You are always doing something marginal when the boss drops by your desk.

    [16] When confronted by a difficult problem you can solve it more easily by reducing it to the question "how would adventure star Indiana Jones handle this？"

    [17] I don't have an attitude problem. you have a perception problem.

    不要插手凶龙恶兽的事，因为你是松脆的，而被涂上番茄酱后味道好极了。

    每个人在别人眼中都是怪物。

    千万别和白痴争论。他们会把你拉低到和他们同等的水平，再用经验击败你。

    切勿成为不可替代的人——如果没人能取代你，你便无法得到提升。

    如果早晨第一件事就是吃一只活青蛙，那么余下的一天便不会有更糟的事发生了。

    每件东西都可归入杂项。

    老板偶然来到你的办公桌时，你总是在做一些无关紧要的事。

    碰到难题时，把它简化成这样一个问题——“惊险片明星印第安那。琼斯会怎样处理？”——你就能比较容易地解决它了。

    不是我的态度有问题，而是你的感觉有问题。